The Anand Marriage as we know it today was always practised by small groups of Sikhs. Towards the end of the 19th century the original Nirankaris were its main proponents, the only group which stuck to this. However, many Sikhs refused to be married in this way preferring the Hindu marriage rites. The Singh Sabha reformers supported the Nirankari rite and this became recognised in the Anand Marriage Act of 1909. The Hindus were outraged that the Sikhs should have a recognised different ceremony. Later, Anand Karaj was integrated into the Sikh Reht Maryada produced as a result of Panthic consensus after fourteen years of consultation.

The Rite of Bliss, Anand Karaj, is an important ceremony for a Sikh. There are four: there is a naming ceremony, Pahul ceremony (amrit), marriage, and death rites.

Each ceremony combines the mysteries and impulses of death and sex. The naming of the new-born infant by the Guru Granth Sahib Ji and the parents is a puzzle to the labours of love the soul will be involved in before it departs once more. Pahul involves accepting death (offering you head) for spiritual re-birth with new parents in the House of the Guru.

The true marriage of a Sikh is the marriage between the soul and the Spirit. The Lavan refers to this ascent in the four rounds. The path to God is not from A to B. For God is not apart from us. The spiritual journey is from the nightmare-phantasy of the ego to the beautiful reality of the here-and-now. "Wherever I see, there I see You." It starts and ends in the same place, yet each time you are standing in a different experience because of the round. Therefore, the circuit around the Guru is used, rather than a straight walk. For a Sikh, it is not the case that God is not here, but is there. Rather, God is everywhere. The two humans re-enact a play of this spiritual journey. The Groom leads for the Gurbani usually signifies God as the personal Groom and the Guru-Sikh as the bride. The Gurus adopt the voice of the bride, the seeker, but also, In Truth, the sought. Yet the couple are not just acting a play. They are making a commitment to this journey by enacting it - they are taking their first steps together. About human relations, the Guru comments that "only those are married who are One Spirit in two bodies." Without making this journey to the One the centre of their life path together (just as Guru Granth Sahib Ji sits at the centre of their marriage rite), they cannot be One. Rather the egos will always drive them into a wild dance, together and apart. The Anand Karaj is equally about spiritual union between soul and Spirit, the affirmation of physical life - sex leading to new life within this committed mini-sadh sangat, the physical-spiritual foundation of the Guru Khalsa Panth, but also the death of ego, which is a prerequisite for physical and spiritual wedding.

Finally, the death prayer is Keertan Sohila, which is also our bedtime prayers each day. It lasts only two to three minutes. There is a link between sleep and death, the smaller rest and the greater. The important point is that the first of the prayers which comprise the Sohila is about the marriage day, between soul and Spirit. When will that day, i.e. day of death and marriage come?